How to: Summer Hospitality

Want to practice hospitality this summer? Can I just encourage you to embrace the awkward and invite someone over! Invite them into your home and into your life. Maybe you're thinking, Ok Jenn, that sounds great but I don't have time to practice hospitality. Let me just stop you right there. I am not talking about this:

Photo by Mariah Hewines on Unsplash

 I do not have the time or energy to set the bar that high. C'mon over here with me where I keep the bar a little lower, a little more attainable. Because that first picture is beautiful and amazing but this momma ain't got time for that.  I mean this:

Right now, hospitality looks like popsicles. Lots and LOTS of popsicles. My kids and their friends know where they are, they know what drawer the scissors are in. I want them all to know that they are loved and safe here and I want them to know they can go get a popsicle and grab the scissors out of the drawer.  If it ends up costing me a million popsicles for those kids to learn that, then it will be a worthwhile investment. 

Right now, hospitality looks like a stack of clean towels, ready and waiting to be needed. And don't forget about that pile of dirty towels waiting to be run through, every single day.  

Right now, hospitality looks like snacks. Whatever we have in the pantry is always fair game when friends come calling. But I try to keep a few go to's on hand in case we ever have people over unexpectedly. Microwave popcorn is a staple I try not to run out of, along with granola bars, an extra bag of chips I keep out of reach, and fruit snacks. I try to make sure I have cheap easy snacks both salty and sweet ready to offer. Along with my basketful of water bottles. (Pro tip I learned from my super smart friend: write on the caps before people get here. When you are unloading them, write numbers and letters on the lids that way they are already marked and people can just keep track of what is already on the lid. BRILLIANT!!! This keeps me from chasing people with a Sharpie trying to write names on bottles!) I also like to keep those flavor drop ins for bottled waters. These all have a long shelf life and it makes saying yes feel easier, because I am already prepared. 

Right now, hospitality looks like bug spray and sunblock. We have a pond that the kids swim in, and our house is semi in the woods, so we have lots of bugs and sunshine to share. Since I want our guests of all ages to be comfortable and have a good time I keep a variety of bug repellents and sunscreen on hand for people to choose from. And life jackets, of all sizes and colors. We try to be ready for any impromptu fun that may come our way. 

Hospitality looks more like saying "yes". Yes, your friends can come over. Yes, you can have another popsicle. Yes, I have sunblock you can use. Yes, you can use our towels. Yes, I have snacks. Keep it simple. Start small. This is what it looks like at our house in the season that we are in.  How can you put yourself at ease and feel more comfortable saying "yes"? Focus on one thing that you can offer when people come over and build from there. If I have already prepared by having things available if and when people come around, it makes ME relax. When I am not worried about having drinks, snacks or sunblock I can focus on actually connecting with the people around me.  

I am in a season of cultivating friendships, not only with my friends, but between my kids and their friends. I want to teach my kids about the importance of friendships and being in community with others. It is hard, it is messy (like really messy) but I want them to learn how to wade through the hard things with the people that we love. Relationships are hard, and none of us are perfect, and we are all going to get it wrong sometimes. We need to walk and talk through this reality with each other.  We NEED each other. I need people and I hate that the world tries to tell me that I need to be an independent woman. I need my people, and they need me back and that is the beautiful wonderful messy truth of friendships. My kids need to learn this. 

Do you feel like your whole world is a mess? I know I do most of the time. I am learning to invite people into my life, mess and all. I know when I go to a friend's house and they have laundry on their couch it ls a relief to me. It makes me feel normal, because lets face it, most days I have at least one load of laundry hanging out on the couch waiting to be folded. When I see people are like me, it makes me feel a little less like I am behind the curve. I am learning that if I wait until I don't have a mess, then I won't usually get around to it. Last summer, we had just started construction on our house, and we had SUCH a mess! I was so sad because I didn't feel like I had anything to offer my friends or my kids friends. I had to get creative, so we made the mess work for us. We turned that mess into the best mud pit ever.  And we had a blast! Even messes are more fun with friends.  Maybe you should invite someone into yours. 

We all have messes! Don't wait until you have your life together to start practicing hospitality. Invite someone in, mess and all!

Love. Jenn